Monday, May 20, 2013

In The Sun

Now Playing:
  • Daft Punk - Disc Wars
  • John Williams - Jurassic Park, Film Score*
  • Steve Jablonsky - Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen, Film Score**
  • Hans Zimmer and James Newton Howard - Batman Begins, Film Score
  • John Debney - Iron Man, Film Score
  • Martin O'Donnell - Truth and Reconciliation Suite***
  • Philip Wesley - Racing Against The Sunset
  • Hans Zimmer - Pirates Of The Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest, Film Score
  • Harry Gregson-Williams - Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Warrior, Film Score
  • John Powell - How To Train Your Dragon, Film Score
  • Henry Jackman - X-men First Class, Film Score
I believe in heroism. I believe in the heroism we find in paper and ink, through the moving pictures in the big screens, and little pixels clustered together in our computers. I believe in the heroes and heroines of yesterday, the living, breathing, flawed people who influenced our futures, and who were in turn influenced by the people of the past and the ones crafted through fiction.
My belief in this is tied rather strongly with my purpose in life—that purpose being writing. I’ve been writing since I was six, so I’ve been coming up with heroes since I could pick up a pen. When I was young, I would write about wide eyed, idealistic little boys and girls who were enthusiastic but sadly unprepared for the challenges I threw at them. My little characters tried their best in their struggles and messed up badly throughout their quests. That said, they were always brave, always just, and always good to the core.
When I was twelve, I had a breakthrough in my short, amateur career. I wrote my first anti-hero, or anti-heroine to be more specific. Her name was Yamazaki Hitomi, a twenty-seven year old woman living in the wasteland of a post-apocalyptic Earth. Hitomi was ruthless. At nighttime, she was plagued by guilt that haunted her in the form of crippling nightmares. During the day, she killed without mercy to survive. She berated her fellow soldiers who tried to be foolishly heroic in the midst of a brutal, gritty war. The book was called Redemption for one reason and one reason alone: she needed to redevelop and rediscover her moral and ethical values. The book was her quest to find her heroism, to dig out the guilt that gnawed at her heart so she could replace it with a burning need to save her world when it was falling apart in front of her eyes.
Hitomi was important because she was the first protagonist whose flaws were explored. Her guilt and refusal to be anything more than a bystander became central themes in the novel. Those things were detrimental to her. They turned her ugly and unbearable. Even as her writer and creator, I sometimes couldn’t stand her. I wrote on because, at times, I saw good in her. She would save a seventeen year old kid despite knowing death was around the corner for her. She loved her father. She never broke a promise. She listened and paid attention when others found their voices and reached out for her. She was not just a fighter, but an unwilling yet loyal protector. In the end, she became a leader.
And that was the point. The point was that her heroic qualities were buried deep within the scars war had inflicted on her humanity. The point was that even the worst of us, the most rude and sarcastic, the most brutal and damaged can still be good at heart.
And when I moved on to other novels, I kept up with that idea. I wrote about terrible people doing incredible things. I wrote about selfish, petty characters valuing love and knowledge. I wrote about criminals finding enough compassion in themselves that they could not take revenge against those who had imprisoned or hurt them.
I wrote like this as a reflection of what I saw in the world. We all learn about Great American Heroes in school then get a sour taste in our mouths when we realize they weren’t pristine, perfect people. Everyone in this world has qualities we dislike, values we disagree with, and traits that are downright insufferable to think about. People are ugly, petty, selfish, cowardly, and mean because the human spirit is fragile. We are easily influenced. We are easily broken.
But despite it all, we are always changing. We can always find it within ourselves to care for others, to want to save the entire world or just a little corner in our town. We have survived as a species, not because of our brutality, but because of our humanity. We all gravitate to good people. We all look up to those who have gone through sacrifice for the needs of the many.
There are heroes everywhere in this world—none of them perfect, some of the invisible, many of them unlikable. But they are among us because there will always be even a shred of heroism within ourselves. Some of us may never find it, and some of us may never need it. But humanity will always have heroes because it’ll always have individuals like you and I. This, I believe.
(Final Speech for English Dx Silly. But I hope you like it)

*IDK why it won't give me the name of that specific song
**Stupid movie with good music ;-;
***Pandora didn't want to say, but I know that song within the first ten seconds.

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Justice League: Environmental Invasion

I'd probably flunk out of film school with this >.> But it was fun. And frustrating. And I guess I'm kind of proud.

I'll do a real update soon before Gise kills me.

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Giselle is evil




P.S: I'm a blonde now. And I went to MDC graduation. It was awesome.
"Science and science fiction have done a kind of dance over the last century... The scientists make a finding. It inspires science fiction writers to write about it, and a host of young people read the science fiction and are excited, and inspired to become scientists...which they do, which then feeds again into another generation of science fiction and science..."
- Carl Sagan, in his message to future explorers of Mars.