Monday, April 21, 2014


Now Playing:
(Wrote a good chunk of this post with Hannibal since I couldn't get to a computer till right now.)

Being without my laptop and having finished all my essays has left me at an odd place, especially now that the semester's coming to a close. After I was done with all my homework, I decided to keep writing my novel in the little red leather notebook my friend Carla gave me for my birthday.

Ten days of writing and I had taken up this much from it:

Whether that's a lot or a little to some people, it did make me give myself the goal of finishing the journal before semester ends. And the way it's all going, I don't think this is too much of an impossible feat.

I haven't written a novel in longhand since 8th grade, where I spent most of my days avoiding eye contact and scribbling down The Band. In terms of characters, plot, prose, etc, it was a piece of shit then and it's a piece of shit now, but sharing it with Yaziris and Danielle, and looking forward to adding a little bit more every day made it probably one of the funnest things I did that entire year. It's almost the same now with Millennium Girl (note: have I even mentioned the title of this book before?). Admittedly, I do miss typing on a keyboard--in fact, not gonna lie, 90% of the reason I'm even writing this post is so I can type. But there are benefits to writing it all in the notebook. Adding notes and angry comments at myself is so much easier. And fun! I've been color coding it with shaved up pieces of chalk and my eyeshadows. (Because I'm too cheap for regular coloring stuff, apparently.)

Immersing into it is pretty easy, but it also gets...a little out of hand. Last Thursday, I was at a really important scene, probably the most important thing in the novel because it's the primary catalyst for Lilith's change. And I was a jittery mess trying to get it all down. I know I have to add more and fix a ton during revisions, but it was still pretty intense for me..

And then things got..weird. Like, the "I feel dirty" level of weird. (Which I blame on the Game of Throne song playing now since I was listening to it then). I sort of always knew Lilith and Ansel had a...dysfunctional...relationship? (Good god, no, that's not the word I want to use). But it's never been sexual. Then that scene happened and I felt like there was this really disturbing subtext that I hadn't picked up before. Don't know what I'm going to do with it now. Hmm...

Another thing: not having Luna with me means I have no idea how far into the novel I am. I'm so used to using a word count to get the general pacing of a story going that this handwriting thing is throwing me off.

Then again, I have no idea why I'm trying to convince myself seeing the word count would have made a difference. Ataraxia got so out of hand even whilst writing it I could tell some scenes were going on for too long. Maybe hastily trying to make the pen move as fast as my thoughts didn't really make it all that differently. Only thing to note is that my wrist hurts, and I blew through three pens and more than half a leather notebook in less than two weeks.

I kind of hate and yet love to think about all I still have to do. There's so much wrong in that manuscript. I hate so many parts of it already and yet I'm so happy at having found Lilith and Wendy. (And the other weirdos, I suppose). I have to change the opening because turns out I'm the last person in the world not to know "character running away from something" is a cliche opening. How could I have avoided all the usual cliches--waking up, battle scene, looking in a mirror, etc--and yet still managed to utterly fuck that up? >_<

I have to clean up Yukiko's and Vincent's characters, have to delve more into the back story and mythology, add more concrete descriptions of the city, move them around from just the two default settings, and expand.  Oh god. Expand. So. Many. Scenes. GHAAAAA.

And yet, I'm super excited. Once I type up and add everything that needs to be added, I'm gonna go to Staples or something and get it printed and bound, then put it away for at least three weeks, and then delve back in with a red pen and coffee. Lots and lots and lots of coffee.

I'm finally going home this Friday. (Well, Saturday morning, Friday night). I'm kind of stressed out because packing and storage, but excited to be done and have the summer all to myself. I didn't exactly get very lucky with the internships and job searches, but I'm childishly happy about that. I want one free summer so I can work on Millennium Girl or whoever else comes attacking my thoughts and dreams within the next few months.

Also, I can probably properly get back to the weekly challenge >.> Man, I'm terrible at these...

Sunday, April 6, 2014

Winter is Coming (In the Summer)

Now Playing: Ramin Djawadi - The King's Arrival (Game of Thrones OST)


I know I said I probably wouldn't do a challenge today, but this is just me being stupid and avoiding the rest of my Beowulf/Skyrim paper for Medieval Lit (yes, that is a thing I am working on). I compiled a wishlist of stuff I want to wear to Supercon, or whatever other convention is near! And since tonight Game of Thrones returns, I decided to add my half-ass attempt at a modern Stark costume.

And it really is half-assed. But it's a cute shirt, cute little hat, cute wolf plushy, and cute bracelet!

(Technically, I've already got the pants and shoes, so no problems there)

I recommended a Lannister shirt and lion plushy for my friend Silvia, since she's my mortal enemy and refuses to align with the wolves.

But oh wellz.

Okay, I promise, no more screwing around. I have to finish these papers before I go mad. I'll be back semi-soon. Or not. Eep!

Saturday, April 5, 2014

Another break >_>

Now Playing: Chu Ishikawa - TD (Tetsuo: The Iron Man OST)

So...poor Luna is dead. Or well, Windows 7 went nuts, and Luna is just kind of not accessing her own operating system because of it. So I am without a computer for the next few days. (Stupid blue screen >_>)

I'm relying on the library till I can run off home at the end of the semester and get my laptop fixed. Said library opens at odd hours and I have like ten thousand essays due, so I don't think I'll be posting a challenge this week >_> so much for not being late again....

Ughhhhh. The laptop crashing made me really angry. I just want this semester over with so I can go back to writing on a regular basis.

Also, oh god Tetsuo. I think the movie traumatized half my Japanese film class, but it. Was. AWESOME. Or at least, the soundtrack totally was. I'm gonna go ahead and blast it while I try and write these essays.

OH! I have some updates on the novel I'm currently working on. (Or was currently working on before my computer decided to flip me the middle finger.) I should be able to post that up soon and kind of give a general idea of who's been inside my head these last couple of months.

Though I'm without one of the essays I was working on, I do have external back-ups of all my non-school related writing and pictures. I guess as soon as I'm done with the essays, I can go back to the novel. I need to finish it before the end of summer, though, since I don't want to take ten months to write it like I did with Ataraxia.

Okay. I'mma go keep writing now. I just wanted another excuse to keep procrastinating >.>
"Science and science fiction have done a kind of dance over the last century... The scientists make a finding. It inspires science fiction writers to write about it, and a host of young people read the science fiction and are excited, and inspired to become scientists...which they do, which then feeds again into another generation of science fiction and science..."
- Carl Sagan, in his message to future explorers of Mars.