Sunday, December 11, 2016

I had this post in my head that started with, "I'm going to die in a car accident."

It's been one of those days.

One of those months.

One of those years. Panic. Sadness. Fear. Unfiltered anger.

I haven't been driving for long. I'm not the best at it but I like to think I'm not reckless. Just. Regular mediocrity with occasional dumb mistakes.

Being in a car makes me horribly aware of how little control I have. Not just on the road, but of my own mortality. I imagine some asshole kids drunk on rum or adrenaline fueled by youthful overconfidence just slashing through my car and snapping me in half.

Then I think maybe I won't die from a car accident. But someone I love will. And no one will know how to deal with the fact that pure stupidity slaughtered them.

Yeah.

It's been one of those years.

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"Science and science fiction have done a kind of dance over the last century... The scientists make a finding. It inspires science fiction writers to write about it, and a host of young people read the science fiction and are excited, and inspired to become scientists...which they do, which then feeds again into another generation of science fiction and science..."
- Carl Sagan, in his message to future explorers of Mars.